THE BACHELOR SEASON 7 - Episode 14 Recap
Well, I don’t know about you, but the emotions are still pretty raw from Elly’s shock rejection and the question on everyone’s lips is what on earth happened? I guess only time and the media will tell what really went down.
But, in true Bachelor spirit the show must go on, and last night was the long-anticipated hometown visits!
A right of passage for any young bachelor still figuring out which out of four women he would most likely like to settle down with, is of course to meet the parents, or in Emma’s case – her two dogs.
We begin the show with a sequence of Mattchelor diving into the pool in slow motion. No complaints there.
First up is old mate Abbie, who reunites with Matt under the story bridge in BrisVegas.
Soon, the pair are in their swimmers, with Abbie sporting a cheetah print bikini to match her animal instincts… if you know what I mean.
A few sexual jokes and intense looks later, they’re making out once again. For the hundredth time, Matt kindly lets us know, “there’s a lot of sexual chemistry there.” Thanks Matt, we have eyes.
The poor staff are forced to spectate the “sexual chemistry” Matt keeps going on about.
Finally, we move on to the juicy part – dinner with Abbie’s family.
We’re hoping this bunch aren’t as sexually attracted to Matt as Abbie is. Oh wait, her uncle just greeted him with, “You are gorgeous!” Never mind.
At dinner, the nine-year age difference is brought to the table and they question if Matt is ready to settle down! Sorry? Abbie is the one who we should be questioning here people.
Matt quickly turns the conversation around by asking Abbie’s mum if she thinks Abbie is ready. Laura reassures Matt, but dark force Uncle Rob steps in as the volunteer interrogator.
With a glass of red in hand, he asks the big questions: “Why are you so special?” and “Why are you worthy of Abbie?” Uncle Rob is my favourite addition to this season.
To close the visit, Abbie reveals perfectly on cue that she is falling in love with Matt.
Back in his hometown of Melbourne, it’s time for Matt to meet the people closest to nerdy buddy Chelsie - the new crowd favourite.
In a bit of a change from Matt’s steamy rooftop experience with Abbie, Chelsie takes him to her local pub for a drink, but we can’t stop questioning his bright red sweater.
Matt skulls his beer while trying to memorise the names of her family members.
One overly extravagant bunch of flowers and a delicious-looking roast dinner later, Chelsie’s “overly protective big sister” grills Matt with all the typical hometown questions.
Out the front of their mansion, Chelsie forgets how to speak but manages to get out that she’s just “falling”, not falling in love.
A+ for effort Chels.
Now we’re in a dog park in Sydney for Emma’s hometown and I hope we don’t see Bill.
Wait a second, is that Emma walking down the aisle? Oh no never mind, she’s just wearing a white blouse. It’s okay everyone, calm down.
Even though it’s not a wedding, we still get the horse and carriage right? Well, at least Emma thinks so.
Up rolls the Hyundai with a blue dog trailer attached.
Emma introduces Matt to her two bridesmaids... I mean “furbabies” Teddy and Bear – how original.
They then drag out the drive to Emma’s house to show off the Hyundai sponsor and Matt is introduced to the best friend Jen and another random guy who has no name or relevance.
In a secret girls chat, Emma tells Jen that she’s fallen in love with Matt and Jen wants to slap Emma in the face.
“You’ve had two dates… wow.”
The secret doesn’t last long though, as Emma tells Matt that she’s ready to move to Sydney and lets him know she’s “falling in love” but we all know she’s already fallen – hard.
Matt doesn’t know what to say and leaves without kissing Emma goodbye. He lets us know that her feelings have progressed far ahead of his own and he doesn’t know if he can play catch up. Fair enough Matt.
Finally, the drama of the episode… Helena’s meltdown. They like to leave it until the end in these reality shows. I don’t get it!
Matt and Helena get dressed in their tennis whites to play tennis but don’t actually end up playing tennis. This show is so confusing.
At the family dinner, Matt is left alone with Helena's "Russian mafia" dad, who is actually French and much to Matt's dismay, doesn't back the footy.
If looks could kill…
There’s more silence around the dinner table until the big bomb is dropped. Matt forgets that Helena spoke French on the red carpet! The horror!
This is a massive red flag for Helena and she is convinced that he doesn’t like her.
Helena practically dumps the Bachelor and he doesn’t know how to take it. “I definitely feel blindsided,” he says. Considering she’s done this before on their single date, is it really that shocking Matt?
Pacing around the cul-de-sac in his cream chinos, he decides that he should probably put up more of a fight and we hear a knock, knock, knock on Helena’s door.
Matt attempts to apologise but doesn’t know exactly what he’s done wrong because the fight is so petty.
Helena then breaks up and makes up with Matt approximately twelve times in her head before deciding to show up to the rose ceremony fashionably late.
Osher’s voice is lower than ever, as he tells the ladies obvious facts they already know. As Matt is about to reveal his top three ladies – Helena steals the show again.
She grabs Matt for a chat and Abbie turns into a snake…
Helena apologises to Matt for coming across as a crazy person and the girls aren’t having it.
Suspenseful music plays as Matt chooses Chelsie first, then Abbie and then Helena.
Emma is left standing. There’s no happy ending for our fairy-tale lover.
Our hearts break for the one who loves being in love, but she hasn’t given up hope of finding her prince just yet.
Next week’s finale is promising fast cars, planes, boats and… baby making on the beach? No surprises there on who’s serving the humping action.
All that’s left now is to hope and pray that Matt still has enough sense left in him to pick Chelsie as the winner.
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